Archives for ACR0NYM

A cold clear night.

It feels like a wretchedly wasted day.  I had so many goals, minor ambitions for it.  I took the first three days off from work to have the whole week, plus the added weekends to work on decluttering multiple spaces in my home.  Although I’ve made some progress, I’m not nearly where I want to be, and I’m ridiculously easily distracted on top of it.

I can’t help but wonder, though, how much a certain sense of disheartenment and futility is slowing me down.  I often get that, this time of year, thanks, I think, to lack of sunlight, combined with all the aspects of the holidays that grate at me so abusively.

If you’ve been paying attention, of course, it’s easy to see why that might be worse this year.  I’m going to push forward, though, and try to keep at it.

I don’t want to hear it, though, if I don’t show up at anyone’s Thanksgiving dinners.

Piling it on.

I truly don’t have any words.  Sometimes it really does just seem like it all gets piled on, and you wonder if you’ll ever be able to dig yourself out again.  Then, you start to wonder if you really want to.

It’s kinda like that.

Although, I want to point out that this is NOT in any way a suicidal gesture, or even a cry for help.  I’ve been burned for that sort of thing in the past.  I’ll say now, what I said then, “I write about it, so I don’t have to do it.”

What a strange week.

This week has been one of those seriously startling mixes of ups and downs.

It’s been unusually fun, from a social standpoint.  Especially nice is the number of people that I’ve gotten to see that I don’t see as often as I’d like.  Also fun has been the number of new experiences for me, including last night’s crazy wine-fueled dinner party.

On the flip side, though, it seems like there’s been an unusual amount of injury and loss, as well.

Some friends of mine were in a really terrible car accident.  I am not going to go into incredible detail, because I don’t think it applies extensively here, and lots of detail can be found here: I haven’t really spoken anywhere about it for a couple of reasons. The main one is that I’m unnaturally aware that there is no way I can comprehend any portion of what they’re going through, nor do I have a great understanding of how to help.  So, I’m doing my best to think good thoughts for them, and hope that everyone pulls through as best they can.

Another good friend recently lost a life-long canine companion.  I’m doing the best I can to keep his spirits up.

One of the friends I get to see less often, undeniably mostly my fault since I’m awful about calling people to get together, had to rush home quickly to be with her daughter when a friend committed suicide.

It seems likely that another good friend of mine’s marriage is coming to an end.

I’m not sure what I’m really getting at, here.  It’s not as coherent and solid as I typically like to be when writing.  It’s certainly been a week to remind one of just how much variety there can be in a life lived even moderately fully.

One good piece of advice I saw recently boils down to this:  Spending time with the people you love is important, as is letting them know you love them.  It may be, in fact, all of what life is really about.

I wish I were better at it.


Oh, no! The fog that turns your whole body inside out!

Oh, wait, it’s just the fog that makes stuff hard far away hard to see…. Regardless, a bit of a scary fog. That’s how my evening ended, headed home from another night frittered away at the club.

It started, though, with a fantastic Beaujolais Nouveau party thrown by blogmistress Jane, and her friends Jeff and Brad.  It was my first party for this entertaining tradition, and I’ve gotta say it was a lot of fun.  Also, it was just a crazy gustatory bonanza.  You can see the menu here.

The amount of work that went into everything was startlingly evident, and truly amazing.  I just want to say a big public “thanks” to Jane, Brad, and Jeff, and all the guests that made for a really good time.

As you might have guessed, though, I left comparatively early, even before the player piano had been fired up for our entertainment, for my usual crowd at the club.  While somewhat entertaining, and comfortable in getting to see a usual crowd, I probably should have stuck around the party, instead.

Sometimes, I just need to learn to quit while I’m ahead.

(PS, I’m claimin’ this one for Friday, since that’s when I started writing it, and that’s when the party was….  I’m gonna get me dem baked goods!)

I got nothin’….

After one of those days that just seems to grind exceedingly fine, and then a nap that proved mostly hallucinatory and disorienting, I’m left a blank slate.

So, here’s a pile of kittens for you:

Now, run along and play in the street.  Daddy needs a drink.

Song of the Day Stuck in Head, all that…

Thanks to Glee, Facebook, and all my silly friends, especially the blogmistress, and Diva, I had Cee Lo Green’s “Fuck You!” stuck in my head for a bit today.  Thanks, though, to my tangential/associative research tendencies, I found a new one to get stuck there, instead.  It’s “Night Train”, also by Cee Lo Green.  Check it out below, if you like.  Be warned, though, that it is also not safe for work.

I like it quite a bit, for a few reasons.  First, it’s based on one of my favorite tunes from Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds, Red Right Hand.  Second, the “rap” treatment, at least for me, actually adds nicely to the already bizarre sensuality of the original, which is not always the case with this sort of thing.  Finally, I just like the overall sound of it quite a bit.

I have to say, I really enjoy when this sort of thing pays off.  I think it’s part of the reason I developed that kind of tendency to ferret out additional information on topics that interest me.

Hey! More than halfway!

It struck me just now that it’s November 17th, which is, in fact, past the halfway point of this whole “NaNoBloPo” thing.  This comes as a genuine surprise to me, for a couple of reasons.

First, of course, is that whole “time” thing.  I’m finding myself a good bit less disoriented, this year, by the time change.  I wonder exactly why that is.  It could be as simple as publishing a really good, solid rant on the thing, I suppose.  It could also be related to all the mentation that was involved in writing that post, and getting it all down in print.  Regardless, I’m surprised that it’s already November 17th, and I don’t feel all that bad about it, in general.

Second would be the whole “post per day” pursuit, and how it’s proving to be at least somewhat less painful than I would have expected.  I’ve had a blog of some sort here for years, and updated it only spottily, at best, and completely horribly at worst.  Having made a specific commitment to sharing here, almost purely for the purpose of sharing, seems to have made things a lot easier, though.

This is something I hope to continue pretty reliably, after the committed period is over.  Finding a new voice here, and an interesting and interested audience is proving refreshing in many ways, and all those things are something I want to continue to develop.

So, thanks for showing up, I’ll try to continue to make it worth your while.

Scattered, disoriented.

So, it was one of those days where my brain was all over the place.  In lieu of an ACTUAL post, I feel like collecting some of the random thoughts and topics that crossed my mind today, as possible starting points for other posts, as well as for some glimpse of the somersaults I sometimes have to endure from the quivering mass of greyish goo that I’m told is between my ears.

  • Facebook, and whether it’s actually a medium for connecting, and re-connecting, or if it’s just ruined by the signal-to-noise ratio.  Prompted by blogmistress Jane, and a story from her radio station: “Was it Something I Said?
  • It Gets Better(?)
  • How many blank notebooks do I really have, and where am I keeping them all?
  • The strange ways in which I can light, or at least add mood lighting to, my home.
  • “Don’t touch my junk,” and all the other associated junk with the backscatter scans at airports, and especially the fact that body scans are, in fact, being kept somewhere, and can be leaked.
  • Will e-book readers replace paperbacks?  It seems very likely that they will for me, at least.
  • Is privacy truly just a myth, now, especially with the amount of crap that we, ourselves, are willing to spew on Facebook, Twitter, and our blogs?
  • Refudiate?  Word of the year?  Really? Word of the YEAR?

I’d say that’s about it, for now.  Please don’t take this as any kind of promise that any of these topics will actually be blogged about.  It’s possible that this post is simply just where topics go to die.

However, undeniably, if there’s a topic up there that you’re really interested in hearing my version of the truth about, let me know in the comments, and I’ll do my best.

Song of the Day, blah, blah…

Heh, so, I haven’t got a whole lot today.  I did, however, have a song stuck in my head for much of the day.  It makes me genuinely laugh out loud every time I hear it.  I believe it’s Betty’s “Oh, bless the rains!” sorta toward the end.  Regardless, here it is:

It’s from Community, a reasonably new sitcom on NBC.  I’m getting pickier and picker about my sit-coms, frankly, but this show approaches genius far more frequently than I would have ever expected it to, when I started watching.  It’s one of those rare situations where you have exactly the right cast performing exactly the right writing.

If you haven’t caught any, and like to laugh, I highly recommend it.

The rap up above is especially funny since it’s a call-back to the “end-credits” rap from the first (well, non-pilot) episode.  Here it is, as well, for your enjoyment:

Just an amusing winter coat thought….

As it cools off, I’ve been pulling out coats that haven’t been touched for a year.

People who know me will not be surprised at all to realize that, so far, every single one of them has had a blank mini-notebook in one of the pockets.

My flight jacket, in fact, has waterproof “Rite in the Rain” paper, and two Fisher Space Pen water resistant pen stuck in the arm pen-holder.

Just, yannow, in case I suddenly need to make a note in a rainstorm.